Every New Year’s Resolution Ever


Lydia Colvin and MaKenna Crary







Week 1

You’re sooooo ready for the New Year! Your resolution is definitely going to stick this year. You have so much motivation, and you know that you are never going to give up on your new goal because giving up on your goal is giving up on yourself.


Week 2

You’re starting to realize that you don’t want to work so hard. That piece of chocolate cake looks really good. But your willpower pulls you through and you go to the gym anyways. Your workouts start to get shorter and shorter and your breaks start to get longer and longer.


Week 3

You’ve found that it is reallllllyy hard to keep a resolution and that your stomach definitely hates you. Your bed pulls you towards it and your baggy sweatshirts hides the fact that you have been stuffing your face while binging your favorite Netflix show. You tell yourself you will pick it up next week.


Week 4

You’ve given up. As you lay on the couch eating potato chips, you tell yourself that next year will be your year. You see your reflection in the computer as the Netflix show pauses. You rush to click play so you don’t start wallowing in self-pity.


Week 5

You know that you really should try and get fit again. Apparently, it makes you happier and makes you less tired – even though you are definitely more than tired even if you only run half a mile. But as you are scrolling through Instagram, you start to look at fitness pages and try your resolution again. It lasts 4 days.


Week 6

You’ve gained fifteen pounds. At least you’ve accomplished something: most pounds gained in the shortest time possible. Well….. Next year will be your year.


Also be sure to check out Paige Oatney’s article about keeping New Year’s Resolutions called Resolutions: The Art of Hopefully Not Failing!